The Way I See It...

Social networking was intended to be a good thing but so many people now use it to display their ignorance. On Twitter, #thewayiseeit is trending and imagine my surprise that quite a number of people tweeted things that made sense! Here are some real nice ones I wanna share. I'll just do my favorite ten in no particular order.

#ThewayIseeit;

1. Everything in this life is temporary. Keep your eyes on the price; getting to heaven! That's eternal.
2. Excuses are present where effort isn't.
3. Positive thinking equals positive results. Keep God first and you'll be blessed.
4. You Have To Give Respect To Get It.
5. In order to be successful you must have tough skin. If a few haters can rattle you then you not ready for success.
6. You shouldn't hold onto someone that doesn't want to be held.
7. Your friends are a reflection of you. They should make you better. You are the company you keep.
8. Social networks don't mess up relationships. Twitter & Facebook just give you a platform & people display their own ignorance.
9. Love all, trust few & do wrong to no one.
10. You can't make someone change; they have to want to.

(Most of them are retweets. I only take credit for no. 1)

Xxx

Flaws and All

How many have seen the Tara and Bella video on Flaws? Did you like it? We've gotten some good feedback and before I start, I just wanna say a big thank you to all those who watched the video and got back to us. Much appreciated. If you haven't seen it, check it out here!!!

In this world where majority are dying to be perfect, I think it's important for those of us that have our heads right to let people know the following things.

1. No one is perfect. Even Beyonce who I think is absolutely gorgeous complains constantly about her ears. Everyone has something on their bodies that they would trade and what's funnier, everyone has something on their body that they hate meanwhile, someone else absolutely loves it!

2. There is only one you and you were made the way you were for a special purpose. So stop trying to change so much. If you ask me, what people should work on changing about themselves is what's inside and not what is on the outside. A beautiful soul has much more value than a beautiful body or face. If that sounds like blab to you, consider this; when you die (which we all will someday!), that body you are so obsessed with making perfect will be buried in the sand and rot. Yes, your body, God made it out of sand and it will go back to being sand eventually no matter how good looking it is.

3. Confidence makes you sexy. Have you ever been out with that friend you know you look much better than yet she gets all the attention? It's the way she carries herself! Men are attracted to women who are confident with themselves. When you feel sexy, you are automatically sexy (to someone).

4. One man's trash, next man's treasure. This isn't to discount the last point but we do admit that some men are just shallow and you can be confident all you want but if you are more than a size 4, they won't send you. Well that's them! Don't let anyone put you down. What they don't see, someone else will. In this life, everyone won't like you. Accept that.

5. Love yourself. It starts with YOU. If you can't accept that body, own that flab and crooked nose, then you'll be miserable for a long time. Ignore the "reality" shows you see of people getting plastic surgery and suddenly having this new look on life. It's BULL. It starts now. You have to love you whichever way you are.

So my lovelies, these are the things we must know! I was inspired to do this by a post I just read on one of my favorite blogs. Check it out here. She goes as far as actually putting up pictures of her body as it is. Kudos girl! For me, I'll just list out the flaws of my body; flaws I'm learning to love/ accept.

*My gap tooth. I've never liked it and I often consider using braces to close the gap.
*Lips. I feel like my lips could be a little less thicker.
*Ears. I have ears that stick out but these I now love cause my Daddy has the same ears so it's our thing :)
*#TeamSuckBelleMakeTheShirtFine!!! Even with my recent weight loss, I still haven't been able to get rid of all the stomach fat!
*Butt. It's soft and that is nice but I wish there was more there. LOL

So you see? We ALL have flaws. Own yours! Xxx

Showing off my gap-tooth :)

Things We should Know before (or by) 30

I just read this post off "Dark Matters", a blog by Chinelo Onwualu. It's titled Things I Know at 30. 
Not only is she an amazing writer, this particular post is real good and I think, a must read for we young ladies so I decided to share.

Enjoy! xxx

Things I Know at 30- Chinelo Onwualu

Tara's Guidelines to WINNING!

I’m at a very good place in my life right now. I don’t remember the last time I felt truly down or even stressed out. It’s been a sunny ride all the way and I would be selfish not to share the tricks of this unending joy!

That’s why I have titled this post, “Tara’s Guidelines to Winning!”. LOL. Legooo!

A solid relationship with GOD

I was born into a Christian family and I have been brought up to honor God and put him first in everything I do. I was also brought up to brush after every meal, tidy my bed in the morning and shower twice a day. But I don’t do these things. What’s my point? Even though I have been a Christian and I was brought up with certain values for God, I haven’t always followed them. Especially in my time in college, it was easy to get up late, rush to the bathroom, get dressed, dash out, go to classes, hang out with friends, and crash at night without even saying one word to God all day!

Now I look back, it’s no wonder the craziness of school could affect me so badly at times. It’s no wonder I used to feel so down some days that the only way to feel better was a bottle of wine. Truth is so many Christians (youth especially) are Christian for the sake of religion. But what we have missed is that Christianity is not just a religion; it’s a relationship, a lifestyle. Since being back home, I have reevaluated my life and my priorities and knowing and loving God is now number one on my list.

It’s not enough to say it though. You have to actually do it. When you love someone, you don’t want to make them sad and you do things you know will make them happy. So with loving God and truly loving Him, there are SOOOOO many things we do that we really shouldn’t. I don’t need to go into them. Y’all know what I’m talking about! With knowing someone, you do research to find out about them, or talk to them and so with knowing God, you have to READ YOUR BIBLE. That’s how to get to know Him. You have to PRAY. That’s how you talk to Him.

Summary, when you draw closer to God, He will fill you with unexplainable joy and peace of mind. So much that not even the madness of the world can get to you. Trust me, I’ve been on this path only a few weeks and I have seen amazing results.

Surround yourself with people after the same things as you!

When you are moving with people who are headed in a different direction than you are, you can’t feel at ease. So if need be, write down the names of the people you chill with and in one word, describe what they are about. If that word doesn’t come close to what you are about, get moving! Birds of the same feather flock together. If you are trying to get your grades up and you chill with people that never study, duh! You are not winning. If you are trying to stop a bad habit and all your friends are on that habit, you are not winning. 

This might not always apply though cause sometimes, you can rub off on someone. So if that’s your plan, to change someone, cool. But when you start to notice that rather than you changing this person, it’s the person changing you instead, don’t be foolish. RUN!!!

Take care of yourself

“Look good, feel good” is no joke. When you look nice on the outside, it will affect your psyche on the inside. 

If you’re not happy with your weight, don’t sit whining about it. Do something about it! If a little make up will help you feel better, use some. I do not advocate looking like a drag queen though! Remember with some certain things, less is more. Eat well, exercise, dress nicely (doesn’t have to be flashy but wear clothes that flatter you) and take care of your hair. These little things will help the way you feel about yourself which will in turn affect how others see and treat you!

That’s about it. If you do these three things, you will be surprised how radically your life will turn around. Say goodbye to feeling low, drama and stress! 

Much love to my avid blog readers. You guys are in my thoughts and prayers :* 

xxx

Star Player

Katt Williams may be a comedian but he gave a pretty amazing concert in DC where he kept telling em something about haters. He said "when you are a real nigga, they gonna hate".

Keep it real and there will always be those that hate you for that. With everything they got. You just have to focus on the star player in this game called life and the star player is that person you see in the mirror everyday.

Since 2011 started, I've been all about my star player. This isn't being selfish and neither is it being unconcerned. I still care about others around me, try to make em happy when I can, sacrifice things to please others...but unlike other years past, I can't and don't kill myself over people's desires. Moment I'm not happy, I make changes cause I'm focusing on me.

I have this person that sends me hate mail (I call it that cause she never has anything positive to say. She insults me and I guess the purpose of her mails are to put me down) and yesterday, she sent what I hope is her last one. I didn't read it cause there is no point reading that piece of crap. She doesn't know me, and she probably wishes she did. I say she doesn't know me cause while she may always seem to have info on the happenings of my life, she has no idea about my perspective on these happenings. She must think and hope that I am depressed, sitting in a corner with regrets. Sorry to disappoint her and all the other haters out there, that is not me.

Things haven't worked out the way I thought they would but still, I am strong, happy and ready for the next phase of life with an amazing family and though a few, some very amazing friends all rooting for me, loving me and giving me support.

And so today is the day I have waited for for a very LONG time. Graduation :D My family has come from Abuja and those who couldn't make it have been calling in with prayers and well wishes. That's another thing about being real; there will be haters, but there will be those who see YOU and will love you just the way you are.

To my readers, keep being real, not just to yourself but to everyone. Let those that have a problem with it  go and hug a transformer or something. In this life, you really owe yourself happiness and you have the power to make yourself happy. Not a boyfriend, your best friend...it's YOU.

Start putting your star player first. Xxx

Still I Rise

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise. 


That's a poem by Maya Angelou. Beautiful words. <3

All Woman Now

I was working on a script for my Film Directing class and I don't know why it hit me at that exact moment, but that's when it hit. It hit that by June this year, I will hold a Bachelor's degree in Communications and Multimedia. It hit that by that time, collecting an allowance from my dad would be lame. It hit that childhood is now behind and it's time to think of myself as an adult that can and should stand on her own two feet.

The other day, my sister asked me about my plans after graduation. I had no idea. I still have no idea actually and the realization that I still haven't made up my mind about something as simple as grad school or NYSC scared me to death. Where am I going? What are my plans for the future? Where do I see myself in the next ten years? It is no longer enough to just ask myself these questions; I have to set the ball in motion to answer them for myself. It's time to finally "woman-up" and take charge of my life and steer it in the direction I see it going.

Taking charge won't happen overnight. It'll be a gradual process and sometimes, I may slip up and act like a child (With my mum around not wanting me to grow up too fast, I really won't grow up too fast! LOL) but I must start now to recognize that adulthood is what comes next and the ways I had as a child should be deserted for new and matured approaches to life.

*I put God first. He is the author and finisher of our destinies and when you let Him, he will lead you in the right path.
*I've made my Twitter name something more sophisticated and grown up but it's not boring (at least not to me!).
*I've learned to control my temper. Walk away from a fight or a confrontation. There is always a way for two people to resolve an issue peacefully.
*I'm starting to talk to people that could play key roles in my future dreams and aspirations.

So you see, it's a start! Rome wasn't built in a day so I won't become the woman I want to be overnight. Still, the ball has been set rolling. From now, it's all WOMAN. x